Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Back to the same old, just a little different

It was hard getting back into the routine this morning.  Last week, K got out of school early on Thursday and Friday.  Then, no school Monday for the holiday and Tuesday was a teacher work day.  It seemed like forever since we'd been to school but, secretly, I was excited to get them and myself out of the house! 

C and I laid in bed way too long this morning and that made for a rushed take off.  The man was in a foul mood because I didn't have time to make his usual...pancakes.  Plus, he didn't like the khaki pants I'd picked out.  Not to mention, I was fighting a kitchen envasion of ants!  So unlike her, K fluttered about accomplishing her tasks and even packed her own lunch -WOW-, her usual...dazed and confused.

We got to preschool and this is where things really went awry, for me at least.  My best preschool friend, J, and her daughter were not there.  I knew this was coming.  They are moving to New York, near the Great Lakes.  Her husband had already made the move and now, it was time for them to go too.  I knew they'd be leaving early this morning to make the final trip.  I just wasn't prepared for it.  Thought I was.  We'd said our good-byes last Thursday.  It shouldn't have felt like this.

The man is the only man amongst a class of what was three girls - now two.  Now best friend-less, one of the other little girls walked up and said, "Will you be my best friend?"  The man didn't answer, he doesn't do well with the girly stuff and his best defense is to ignore them.  J and I always used to laugh at what a "man" he is, even at four years old...Yeah, lady, whatever you say and away he'd walk.  Poor little girl, I too, felt like someone had dropped a bomb.  I felt the ping.

I did my usual...groceries, errands, etc.  Still, things were just so off kilter.  We finally arrived home and I went to take care of the chickens.  The man called for me, saying he was hungry.  So, I made, guess what?!  PANCAKES!  A double batch, so he'd have some leftovers for breakfast, and I'd get off easy tomorrow morning.  I put away and straightened up and then, sat down to write my oh-so-missed friend, J.  Distress.  (I hope she writes back soon!!!)

I told her we'd have to come visit over the summer, she agreed.  K thinks the world of her daughter and the man wants to see New York and the Great Lakes.  So, we're planning a little trip. 

The older I get, the more I feel the pull to travel, to take my children here and there and show them a small piece of this world.  This is another of those opportunities that I didn't have growing up.  We went to the beach every summer, traveled to nearby states for vacation, traveled to play sports but, never too far away. 

The thought of a trip excites me but, it doesn't cover the sadness of losing my friend.  Don't get me wrong, I'm excited for them.  Excited that they'll be somewhere new.  Excited that they'll be reunited as a family.  Excited that it's sooo beautiful there.  I will nurse this little empty place in my heart.  I will make cute things and gleefully put them in the mail, thrilled to surprise them.  Farewell friends, I miss you!