Saturday, March 31, 2012

first Saturday soccer

I know you're missing this.  Every bit of it.  The practices.  The games.  The encouragement.  The criticism.  I know we're both looking at the bigger picture.  And that's good.  But, I'm sorry.  That it's this way.  That you can't be here.  Don't fret.  It's temporary. 

And I know what you'd say.  "Don't worry about posting them, go to bed, it's late."  How easily you forget.  Tomorrow's Sunday, silly.  Our day of rest.  The Easter Story is being told by Miss L, therefore none of the leaders need a lesson for Awana.  So these are for you...

And I apologize, they aren't the best.  I wasn't on my "A-game" or in "photographer mode", but they'll suffice.

This girl was serious.

She was fast.  And she was on fire.
They all were.
Their dynamic was DYNO-MITE!

I don't know how this happened,
but it did and personally,
I thought it was a bit comical.

It went waaaaay up and then,
it came straight back down to her.

And there's that elbow she's famous for. 
She may be small, but she had bigger heart.
Our girls didn't hesitate for a second,
they never backed down.

She was in it to win it.
They all were.
And they did.

This was right before the tumble.

And then, she flipped, end to end.
Landing in a sobbing, heap of pain.
Which then, led us here.
But you already know that story.

first Saturday soccer + ER visit

We try to live an uneventful life, in a good way.  Honest, drama-free, laid back, easy going.  This weekend was anything but and it's only Saturday.  This was the last scene at soccer before I laid down my camera and bolted onto the field...

The girl took a tumble, said she was pushed, and landed funny.  Immediately, I gently dropped my camera in the bag and I stood up out of my chair.  In a split second, I knew something was wrong.  When she came to a stop, she wouldn't get up.  Laid there, holding her right arm with the left.  And I ran to her.  She was weeping, crying "Mommy, it hurts.  It hurts, Mommy."  It wasn't like her, not at all.  Ever so slowly, we got her up.  Walked ever so carefully to the bench with her while Coach got an emergency ice pack.  He cracked it, we put it on the arm and within those few minutes, the game was over.  Off we went to the car.  I put her in first, asked Nana if she would take the man and carried his seat to her car.  When I got back, Goalie was there, trying to comfort her.  She asked to go with us and more than she knew, I needed the company.  I told her it was OK as long as her parents said so.  And we whisked my K off to the ER.

We got a call from Coach on the way, wanting to know if he could do anything.  No, I replied and he said he was praying for us.  Right then, I felt a lump in my throat and the tears welled up.  I thanked him for his prayers.  Sometimes, just to hear someone say they're praying for me means the world.  And it did.  I began to pray too.  That it would just be sprained and then in an instant, I knew I was being selfish.  God only gives you what He knows you can handle.  And I knew we could handle it, even if it was broken.

We went to the local hospital which, in the past, has had a bad rap.  We've been there numerous times and had positive experiences though.  The waiting room was almost empty.  One lady sat, waiting for someone else.  Literally, as soon as we took our seats, they called us back.  They weighed her and minutes after we got in our room, the nurse appeared.  He was young, well-mannered, soft spoken.  He asked Miss K lots of questions, took her blood pressure, pulse and temperature.  By this time, she had calmed down a bit and was able to maintain composure.  One of his questions was if she smoked, drank alcohol or did drugs.  She said, "No." and with the most serious tone, he replied, "That's good."  And we all laughed.  Do you know, when asked what her pain level was from 1 to 10, homegirl said, "Five or six."  What?!  Are you kidding me?  She'd cried real tears, sobbed for 17 minutes, continuously asking "How much further?  It hurts."  Wasn't it at least an 8?  Then, he went to put in an order for x-rays.

In the meantime, Nana and the man showed up because he wanted to be with "his sissy."  The nurse practitioner came in, asked more questions, prompted Miss K to move her arm, wrist and fingers.  Although it'd been quite a while, years even, she recognized the man.  He'd been there a couple times before.  She was sweet and encouraging.  Then, another lady came to take Miss K down to get xrays.  "Can we go?", asked the small people of our crowd?  And her reply was "Yes."  We walked through some double doors and down a short hall where she took Miss K in and then, came back to the hall where we sat in chairs waiting.  She showed us photos of her adorable grand kids and told us stories about them.  Not ten minutes later, there was Miss K again, escorted by a tall, lanky lady with short blond hair.  She was also polite and said our girl was tough, a trooper.  I never doubted that one bit, but I thanked them both.  Grateful for their cheery moods, their medical talents, and those two things put together mixed with laughter, eased my mind.

Back in our room, Nana had gotten our nurse to turn on the TV.  Lord, have mercy, it was on Lifetime.  Homegirl don't play that and she was the patient.  So, I was ordered to put it on Disney where we sat watching Wizards of Waverly Place for a bit.  ThankyouLord.  (Lifetime makes me ill if you didn't catch that.  I'm not a hater, just not my thing.)  Then, our nurse came in and gave our girl some pain meds.

Next, the doctor sauntered in.  He talked to Miss K and then went back to the hall to view the x-rays.  Our little group trailed behind.  Every single one of us lingered over his shoulder and then, he questioned, "Whatta you think?"  Maybe he was being sarcastic because afterall, we were hovering, but I was meaning to be funny when I replied, "We think whatever you think."  But then, Miss Know-It-All-Nana-from-the-orthopaedic-office steps up and says, "Right here."  She pointed to the screen and their was the tiniest dark area.  She was right.  He said it was a buckle fracture on her wrist.  "If you have a break, that's the best kind to have."  And the angels sang.

Lastly, another sweet lady came in.  She looked around at the five of us and asked who the patient was.  We all laughed and of course, she chose the girl with ice pack on her arm.  She measured Miss K's arm and went to gather her supplies.  "Who wants to help?" she asked.  And immediately, Goalie had her hand up saying, "Me, me."  Together, they splinted it and said we'd have to follow up with the orthopaedic doctor on Monday.  Lucky us, Know-It-All-Nana gets her smarts from workin' at the orthopaedics office.  So, we got the hook-up there.  We were done.  We made it out alive.  All in one piece.  All together.  With laughs in between.  ThankyouJesus.

Thursday, March 29, 2012


OK, so the chicken house didn't make the cut afterall.  Between you and me, I'm procrastinating.  It's my nature to push off the cat litter box and shoveling the chicken house.  But, I got the mowing and weedeating done (now I've got the itches despite the shower I took 8 hours ago), yard sale items and boxes organized, laundry, took care of some bills, made a simple dinner and did some short visiting.  Not bad, right?  I even got an entire chapter in while waiting for the man to get out of school.  I'll try to make a better effort to appear here more often, no promises.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

the good mama says...

Lately, I've been catching a bunch of flack from my lack of attendance here.  I'm sorry but, life waits for no one and while we had a whirlwind weekend, this week has been just as crazy.  The man is sorrowfully missing his daddy but, in love with the warm weather that allows for bike riding everyday after school.  Miss K is constantly found on the "reading pillow", in the hammock swing or curled up on the couch nose-deep in "The Help".  Now, we're both dying to watch the movie again.

Work is busy.  I had the privilege of working the tent sale last weekend.  It rained and was a bit yuck but, the sun finally came out and warmed things up.  All in all, I had a great time, made some amazing purchases and it kept my mind off of the present.  The kids had a fun day with Nana venturing to some local haunts.  Then, we all met up Saturday evening where we relaxed and munched on their yummy finds.

Easter Break is quickly approaching and I'm excited to be making the trip up to IL to visit C.  Uncle J will be tagging along and we're all ecstatic about that.  I already have plans for our Easter celebration.  Yes, the infamous checklist and groceries are ready.  Miss K asked when we could start packing.  Lord, I love that girl.

That's it in a nutshell.  I've really gotta get to bed.  I've been up late too many nights now.  Tomorrow promises to be busy too...the herb garden needs to be weeded.  The grass needs to be mowed and weed eating needs to be done.  The big garden needs planting.  The good mama says the chicken house needs to be cleaned.  The cat litter box calls.  I'm sure I'm forgetting things and this doesn't even include anything inside.  On top of all this regular busyness, there's soccer, Bible study, kids' choir, and soon to start t-ball.  Now, do you see why I haven't been here?  Oh sista, they ain't enough hours in a day.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

deliberate disregard

I've avoided this place completely.  Stayed away intentionally.  I've been using every possible second to savor the smells, the moments, the time that's left.  He asked if I was getting excited, and not to rain on his parade, I am excited for him, but I'm not excited that he'll be there and we'll be here.  That I'll be holding down the fort again.  I'm not excited for the sleepless nights and the long, exhausting days.  That we'll miss him dearly.

I won't list the things he'll miss.  I won't go there.  We'll skip vacation in exchange for short stays that'll equal our driving time or so it seems, and moving.  And we'll have to like road trips, we'll just havta.  We don't travel well unless it's on a plane.  Oddly, that one's easy.  Road trips make us crazy.  When everyone begins to hate the smell of pavement and is sick of their neighbor that's when I'll pull out the "surprise pack".  It works every time.  They'll indulge in travel Bingo, we'll discuss every road sign from here to there, read all the license plates in between and I couldn't forget, "find a yellow car."

Last night, while we were praying, our little man said, "Mommy, I don't know what to pray about."  So, I explained to him that God wanted to hear all of it, not just some, but every little bit.  He wanted to hear the fun stuff, the sad things, the good, the bad, the ugly.  He wants to know when you're confused, hurt, angry, happy, hopeful, silly.  He just shook his head and I hope this short conversation sunk in.  I hope he'll drown his sorrows with Jesus when he's pining for his daddy.  I love the quote, "Don't tell your God how big your problems are, tell your problems how big your God is."

I refuse to let these times get us down. We will not succumb to sadness and misery. We will find joy in the small things and be ever thankful for family and friends, and our God who never leaves our side. It'll be another era of growth for us all. We'll walk away appreciating each other more. Our strengths. Our weaknesses. Our family. Our God.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

ah, the moon

Saturday night, the boys were on a hunt, so we ventured out too.  We went visiting, to see some folks that I hold near and dear to my heart.  We stayed out late and the Lord knows we paid dearly for it the next morning, but it was a pleasant time spent with loved ones.  We arrived with caramel frappes and played numerous hands of Uno in which the littles beat the pants off the rest of us.  On the ride home, we spotted the great big moon and we couldn't help but stare.  After putting small people to bed, I grabbed my camera and tripod, and in a hurry, I ran out into the crisp night air and caught this...

Thursday, March 8, 2012

head over heels

May I introduce you to my newest, most favoritest piece of jewelry in the world?

I fancied the way she looked, so simple and dainty, in the picture.  Little did I know when she arrived, I would fall head over heels for her.  I held her in my hands and it wasn't her charm.  No sirree, it was what she said.  She softly whispered "dream" but, it spoke volumes to my heart.  This adventure, excitement, apprehension, it's all because of a dream.  One man's dream to be more, to step out - and I commend you.

The countdown says 16(ish) days left.  Our emotions are off the chart right now.  Some days, I'm happy-go-lucky, some days I'm wound up tighter than a rubber band on a 6-foot tall rubber band ball.  I even think Mr. A picked up on it this morning when I playfully/sarcastically, yet somewhat seriously snapped at him saying "And do you want me to warm your coffee?  Make you another cake?"  when he asked me to go get something.  I never claimed to be perfect, but that might possibly be a good way to lose my job.

Poor Miss K, she's crazier than she ever was.  Whew, she's all happy-happy-joy-joy and then, BAM! like Emeril Lagasse, she's thrown spice in your eye and you never saw it comin'.  I wonder, how long this will go on?  Because we've done this before, will it be easy to adapt or will we continue to grapple week after week after miserable week?  I surely hope not.  

I'm gonna do my darnedest to keep our reduced family content.  I'll offer my empty bed to little monkeys who miss daddy any day.  We'll share picnic lunches amongst the ants and spend our days cuddling long, floppy-eared Walkers and red-feathered ladies.  She and I will lay beneath our favorite tree and read until we become drowsy, all the while he'll excavate the sand box and have Monster Jam rallies.  And we'll pray, pray and pray some more.  I'm stopping there.  That's enough of the blues.  And moving on.

Miss K is absolutely dying to send out invitations for our party which is still almost 7 weeks away. ~sigh~ And I may or may not have prepared a long, long wish list of jewels which are conveniently organized on a spreadsheet cuz I just might be a total nerd like that. Oh well, quirks are quirks and I've learned to embrace mine.   It's OK, I have awesome, awesome friends (in which I won't name any names but, you know who you are) who share some of these same obsessive compulsive issues. (i.e. storing your shoes in the box, among other things; wanting your house to be spotless, including clean sheets and carpets before leaving for vacation, regardless of the fact that your pet-sitter will not be staying at your house - it'll just be the animals and do Max and Kolby really care if you dusted?)   Glad I got that off my chest, thankyouverymuch.

I've been asking all week, "Is it Friday yet?"  Although, Tuesday nights could replay all week, as long as there was ladies' Bible study and a gargantuan bowl of Mrs. G's chicken salad.  If you haven't been, you really should come.  We have an amazing time together, learn lots about God's word and gorge ourselves on the most superlative food you've ever put in your mouth.  (Call me, we'll talk.)  Anyway, here's to the weekend and no work!

Thursday, March 1, 2012

worry tries to set up camp

The more days go by, the more I begin to question..."Will there be _______?" 

The wild?

Will stress go on hiatus
while we walk through the fields for an hour or two?

Will there be feathers to find?

And trees to climb?

Will we live in a house with a postage-stamp yard
surrounded by sidewalks and paved streets?

Or will there be quiet creaks to soak little puppy bellies and toes in?

Will we ever raise another red-feathered flock
in an old rustic shed with peeling red paint?

Sometimes I think these questions are odd.

Shouldn't I be worried about having a bigger house, more land?
No, those are just worldly possessions.
And I've come to sincerely realize and truly appreciate that
it's not what you have,
it's what you make of it.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm not crazy yet for
being so fanatical about this escapade.
Will a thirteen-hour ride make us all bonkers?
Of course it will.
{This is the part where I believe we're absolutely nuts.}

I'll miss our chickens.
The walks we'd go on with the dogs behind the house.
I'll miss sweet, sweet Daisy.
I can't imagine leaving her behind,
but it's what he says we have to do.

Worry tries to set up camp but,
we'll find new things to do,
new places to go.
We'll meet new people.
And I'll keep telling myself,
it'll all be OK.

Matthew 6:34
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow,
for tomorrow will worry about itself.
Each day has enough trouble of its own."

my heart aches

She remains unenthusiastic about moving, but I can't blame her.  If I were her age, I wouldn't be excited about leaving, starting over at a new school, being the new girl.  She knows everyone here, all the teachers, just about every fellow student, the shortcuts to class.  She's still good friends with a girl who she attended preschool with.  When you're eleven, it doesn't get any better than that. 

God knows, the summer before I went to middle school, I had nightmares about not being able to open my locker or being late to class because I was lost inside the school.  Not that it doesn't matter, but this coming year, she would've been changing schools and heading over to the middle school anyway.  It's different though, all of her friends would've been there with her, to endure the changes, the stress.  It's just not gonna be the same.  It makes me acutely aware of the lump in my throat and the heavy ache in my heart for this girl.

She's comfortable.  Unconsciously, that's what you desire as a child.  Trust and comfort.  On the other hand, we're older, we've mellowed and now we're ready for some adventure.  So again, I drop this in God's hands, pray that He'll ease the tension in her heart, and that we'll be able to fill this girl with love and reassurance so that it's not such a burden.  We'll all have our own ordeals, but somehow it feels crucial that we be there for her the most.  She's somewhat fragile, sensitive.  Her emotions are running high due to that in between phase of being a child and becoming a young lady, hormones.  They're all over the chart and sometimes she's normal, sometimes she's a blubbering mess.  Oh let's be honest here, that's females for ya.

I'm hoping our move will be this summer.  It'd be nice to get settled and acquainted as best we could before school starts.  Time enough for her to find a few friends.  All these things, they're in His hands.  I keep reminding her of how charming and lovable she is and that comes from within.  It's not something that can be purchased, it's who you are.  She has so many friends and that means something.  In any case, we'll continue to encourage our children and as quoted over at Seventy Piggies, "love them up tall."  I adore that phrase.

If you're wondering, will we ever get that thumb out of his mouth?  Yep, I'm wondering the same thing myself.  Right now, it's feeling impossible.